New England Spring Fever

Spring fever is hitting a bit early this year. I mean it's only early March which, for us New Englanders, means we could easily get more snow any day. Fingers crossed- I really hope not. I have already started my spring preparations. If you are outside of the four season climate, you just have no idea what a hassle autumn and spring are here. No. Idea.

• Wash all of the winter coats, snow pants, gloves, hats, mittens, scarves, etc. and put in storage.
• Store all winter clothing (sweaters, flannel pj's, thermal underwear.) People who do not live here have no idea what a pain in the ass it is to have 2 full, separate wardrobes that have to be switched out every 6 months... for all five people in the house!
• Pull out spring/ summer wardrobes (skirts, bathing suits, t-shirts, etc.) wash them and arrange in closets, dressers.
• Put away snowmobile, snow blower, shovels, rock salt, etc.
• Take out patio furniture, hose, lawn mower, bikes, motorized kid toys, etc. Clean and air out.
• Take out grill (Yay!!!) Get cleaned and make sure propane tank is full or that you have charcoal on hand.
• If you have storm/winter windows or plastic covering windows- those need to be removed.
• We need to rearrange furniture because, as any good homeowner knows, you can have furniture covering heating vents or baseboards during the winter months. This means moving heavy furniture around twice per year to maximize heat circulation.
• If you are like some of my neighbors, it might be a good time to put Christmas decorations away... maybe...
• We have a lot of raking to do in the spring in New England. You have whatever leaves were left when the first snow came too soon, you have rocks and debris left from the plowman, you have limbs and branches broken from ice and snow.
• We have to wash all walls, windows, cupboards to remove the buildup of dust, soot, grime that was blown around from wood stove or baseboards.

This is just a small list of the crap we go through- check out the comprehensive checklist I posted last spring if you want an actual list to print out and work with.

19 Months and Growing

This is what 19 months looks like. Sweet, innocent, adorable. 19 months is 26 pounds and 34 1/2 inches (at least in this house, which seems to grow giant babies. That is 95 percentile in height and 75 in weight!)

She has just enough hair for piggy tails, but is also just old enough to saw "Ow.Ow!" when I try to put it into elastics.

She has outgrown most of her 18 month clothes, but is forced to wear her Huck Finn pants for a couple of more weeks until we get into shorts and skirts full time.

She loves to run and thinks she can jump- although her feet don't really leave the floor (but don't tell her that!)

She is a constant positive reinforcer. She will clap and cheer for whatever you do. It's pretty exciting to get undressed for the shower and have your audience giving uproarious approval.

What does 19 months sound like? Well, it sounds like she is really starting to get a lot of words all at once. Let me translate:

I la ooh: I love you. (My personal heart wrenching favorite which she is required to repeat at least 400 times a day if she expects me to feed, bathe, play with or change her.)

Ready: Ready (This was oddly one of her first words.)

Buttaw: Buttocks (As in, "Kiss my buttocks.")

Titty: This can be translating into Sissy, kitty or pretty... you just need to look towards the pointed finger.

Peez: Please. With a huge grin and empty sippy cup needing refill thrown in your face.

Yummy: Request for anything suitable for her to stuff in her face. Typically in someone else's hand or plate.

Buddy: Her pink blanket. Although all 3 of our girls have had blankies, she seems to be really attached and needs to have it whenever going to bed. If you put her to bed without it, she will stand in her crib yelling at you , "Buddy!"

She says the standard Mama, Dada, baby and pretty much any other word you say. It is fun to sit with her and have her repeat you. Like when you say, "Picklenoodles," she will say, "Pippynoonoos."

It is just a perfect stage. Still small enough to carry and hold and cuddle... yet starting to get her own little personality and able to just fill you up with her laughter and smiles.

19 months already. Where to the moments go?

Weekend Link Love

Have you seen my new About page? What do you think?

Love this adorable printable to watercolor with tea. (Yes, as in tea that you drink)

If you have kids, you absolutely need to bookmark this great activity for a rainy day. We have played it multiple times with the girls (4 and 9 year old) and even when they have had guest over. It has been a huge hit. It's fun, free and I have gotten some hilarious home movies out of the deal.

On my Marriage Ref/Personal Hygiene questions- It was a resounding 7-2 win for me. (I had 1 Twitter vote as well) Colby is to cease and desist any and all toenail clipping outside of the bathroom. Stay tuned for the next installment.

For all of my Maine friends and family: you HAVE to follow this blog. Hilarity. Sort of like a Maine friend on Facebook who said, "saw a sign for taxidermy and a gentleman in a snowmobiling coat at the movie theater... guess where I was this weekend? :)" as if there were any way to distinguish exactly where in Northern New England that might be.

Ok, off to enjoy some of this wonderful fire in the sky.

My Own Marriage Refs

Colby and I watched a portion of the Marriage Ref last night. We both love the concept of the show- but were disheartened after watching it and realizing that it won't last. The host was terrible and the format a little odd- but the idea of getting to be a voyeur into another couples ridiculous squabbles is still fascinating.

And, of course, this lead my wandering mind to the disagreements that Colby and I have in our house and how fantastic it would be to have them settled once and for all in front of a national audience (since we all know that, of course, I would reign victorious in any and all disputes) But WAIT...

I have a national audience! Right here! And how fun would it be for you to be our marriage ref? I am going to start posting some some of our minor squabbles in a fair and unbiased manner while trying to conceal which side each of us are on and see if we can get some votes on which of us is the superior right-fighter.

Episode One: Public Displays of Personal Grooming

We have had a long standing debate with this issue. One of us thinks that personal grooming should be kept in the bathrooms. This includes brushing and flossing teeth, shaving, mustache bleaching, etc. But the most cantankerous subject is the clipping of toe nails. This person feels that it should only be done in the bathroom and might just puke in their mouth a little over the sight of flying toenail bits while the other person feels they own half of the house and if they want to clip their toenails, they have the right to. And the revocation of this right makes their house a f@#*ing prison... on Planet BS in the galaxy of This Sucks Camel D!cks!

So, where do the Marriage Ref's stand on this issue?

I would love for others to join me with this. Post your disputes on your blog and then leave a link so that I can come put in my two cents... to be settled here... in our forum. Please tell me we are not the only people fighting over toenails.

Turning 29 Wasn't So Bad

Yesterday was a fine birthday, indeed. Although, I am not technically celebrating birthdays anymore... you can't tell kids this, they want a party for my birthday, for dad's birthday, for the cats birthday... you know- cake and all that. So I came home from work at 7am... to a clean house! Now that starts the day off wonderfully. Usually my first half hour home is cleaning up breakfast stuff and random messes from the evening before so that the girls have a clean palette on which to make new messes.

And I had beautiful cards from the whole family and gifts! My tattoo was my gift and I didn't expect more, but I got 2 beautiful Lodge cast iron pans! I have wanted cast iron pans forever and somehow Colby remembered this and bought me 2. I am quite excited to cook with them and get them all seasoned.

I also got a fantastic gift certificate for "A Day of Peace and Quiet." Meaning Colby is taking all 3 girls to his parents for a day and night! Did you see that? All three kids! I have not been alone in my house... um... ever. I can stay in bed all day, eat whatever crap I want, read magazines, sit in absolute silence. This is THE.BEST. PRESENT. EVER. Thank you so very much my dear husband. (Oh, and I am totally spending the whole day Friday cleaning so that I don't have to lift a finger on Saturday.)

Ariana and Annika also made dinner (breakfast for dinner: brinner) and cooked me a birthday cake:

And then I was serenaded with a piano rendition of Happy Birthday before I blew out my candles:

It was the first cake my girls have made me all by themselves- and it was yummy. Great job, ladies.

After that I had to take Acadia to get blood drawn... nothing says Happy Birthday like wrestling your 18 month old to have a needle stuck in her.

And then we topped the night off at the library to celebrate Dr. Seuss' Birthday.

It was a great day. I guess 29 isn't so bad after all.

Daddies Say The Darndest Things (Open mouth- insert foot)

It's not only my children that say things that boggle my mind- my husband is a champ at that as well. Take this conversation he and I had last week:

Me: I entered Acadia into a contest for a photo shoot for some organic baby snacks.

Him: And?

Me: Oh, I haven't heard anything yet.

Him: Oh, well you really should have entered Annika... she definitely would have gotten it.

Me: What?!?!??

Him: Well you know she is so beautiful.

Me: Colby!

Him: I mean, Acadia is cute and all, but Annika has those eyes.

Me: Colby!

Him: What?

I am glad he doesn't save his inappropriate open-mouth-insert-foot comments for just me.

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And then, during the Olympics, Michael J. Fox had a television promo.

Him: Wow, Michael J. Fox looks really awkward in that ad.

Me: Colby, he has Parkinson's disease.

Him: I know, but his mannerisms are just.. off.

Me: Colby! He has a degenerative disease that causes uncontrollable spasms.

Him: Come on, they could have had him do another take to try to do better.

Me: (Daggers shooting from my eyes.)

Him: Oh, never mind.

Me: Right. AND I am going to blog about this.

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For the record, she is beautiful:

And she is beautiful as well:

And so is she:

All three are the sweetest little girls you could ask for with smiles that light up any room that they enter. We are blessed indeed.

13 Tips When Getting a Tattoo

So, my adventures in tattooing continued last night when I had this turned into this:

(Ignore the red marks, that is the remnants of Sharpie used in the sketching process.)

As I have spent a lot of time consumed with this artwork the past few weeks, I though I might impart some sage advice on you all. Here are my top tips to consider before you go under the needle:

1. It hurts. A lot. Anyone who says otherwise is a big, fat liar. Your skin is being punctured thousands of times per minute with needles. See that red: That is blood. You are purposely causing injury to yourself. Keep that in mind

2. Eat. Going to get a tattoo on an empty stomach is not a good idea. You might get faint, and that will only be exacerbated by having an empty stomach. Also, bring a small snack and a bottle of water with you. You may need a break to get your blood flowing again.

3. Don't get any major tattoo work until at least the age of 25. Ask anyone you know how they feel about the tattoo they got at age 18- and 9 out of 10 are less than enthused. We are not the same people at age 30 that we were at 18 (thank God) Take it from someone who knows (remember the belly tattoo I got that was so cute on my 17 year old washboard abs... not so much after 3 pregnancies... just saying.)

4. Names are almost never appropriate. Unless it's a mother or a child's name, for all that is holy, Don't Do It! We all want to live in Never never land where we find our soul mate at age 20... but you'll be kissing a lot of frogs.

5. A short list of unacceptable tattoos... any Disney character, any depiction of or reference to drugs or alcohol, unicorns, roses or hearts with daggers.

6. Imagine your mom with the tattoo you want. If you recoil in horror- think how your children (or future children) will feel.

7. Try to avoid red, especially if you are sensitive. It might have nickel in it, which will cause a reaction in most people.

8. Do not go to a tattoo artist with an exact piece of art that you want a duplicate of. They are called artists for a reason and you need to let them do their magic. Give them an idea of what you want and let them create your own personal art piece. If you want them to recreate something exactly as you have it in your mind, you will never be satisfied. (The exception to this is a portrait tattoo, which takes a phenomenal tattoo artist to complete.)

9. The biggest reason you need to choose a tattoo artist is references (which also includes seeing their artwork in person.) You should never EVER stop into a tattoo shop off the street and get a tattoo from someone who's work you have never seen. Even photos they have on hand are not proof that they will create the art you want to carry around for the next 50 years.

10. In getting references and checking their work, make sure that you are looking at a piece with the same feel as what you are going for. They might be adept at skulls and wizards, but not at all comfortable with butterflies and feminine swirls. When a wonderful friend of mine got this tattoo
I asked her immediately who the artist was because I knew he had the feminine touch I was looking for.

11. Unless you are in a gang, Old English is rarely the font you want on your tattoo.

12. No face tattoos. Period.

13. Avoid tattooing any place on your body that might get fat/develop cellulite/ grow muffintops... yes, I know this severely limits the available places we can place artwork but if you have ever seen a droopy boob/cottage cheese thigh/post-baby belly tattoo- then you know exactly what I am talking about (see where the wrist tattoo works well?)

That's is my quick list. DO you have any others that I may add?

(Thank you for my birthday tattoo, Momma!)